The Final Frontier

Thanks to all for your kind words in my soul search the past couple days.

I've managed to get the kick in the ass that I've needed (don't ever be afraid to ask the universe to give you signs as to where you're meant to be.)

I've been doing a lot of work with life-after-death stuff. Yeah, I just lost most of you. I'm probably getting w-a-y too philosophical at a time when I'm strung out in so many directions, but it's kind of necessary.

I'm having very *John Edward*-like experiences. Not talking to dead people, but I'm catching strange vibes from people. I walked into a store, and before walking out, I asked the lady about her left knee. She just stood there and thought I was crazy. I told her that it had been bothering her for three months or so, and the docs couldn't find a reason why. I told her to go have ice cream with her daughter, and that if her daughter wanted to wait a year to go to college, it didn't mean that she wouldn't succeed in life. The lady almost fell over. Her daughter had just graduated from high school when her knee pain started, and she wanted to get a job in the city instead of going to college. The one thing that kept mother and daughter on the same page was that they would go once a month for ice cream. Yeah, I'm a freak, apparently. And, that wasn't the first time, nor has it been the last. I'm pretty good with reading strangers in the grocery store, at work, or in the mall.

My crossroad is that Hilton is offering me something full-time when I finish school in 6 weeks. That's a good, solid job. Massage, energy work, and whatever this strange other talent is seem to be calling to me, but then I'm on my own. No salary. No 401K, no paid vacations, no sick time.

Add to all that, I feel like I'm negating all that my father, grandfather, and uncle brought me up to do. God is my family business, as I often joke. Well, God doesn't mention anything about the stuff I'm doing, other than it's on the path to evil. Ah ha. Daddy is on the *good guy* side, with my work on the *bad guy* side. I feel that if I choose this other stuff, I'm letting my family down. Oh, and I'll spend my time in eternal damnation.

Ouch.

Well, that's what's going on. Leave it to your j.lo. to have the freaky life, kids. Any input is appreciated, but I needed just to put this all out there more than anything.

It's one thing to think you're a freak, but it's another to admit it to your friends :)